How I Rebuilt Purpose in Singapore as an Expat Mom on a Dependent Pass
Are you like me—someone who didn’t even know what an “expat” was until a major life change sent you overseas? When my family relocated to Singapore, I found myself entering an entirely new chapter—not just geographically, but in identity and purpose. This is the story of how I transitioned from a biotech researcher in the U.S. to an expat mom navigating life in Singapore—rebuilding my sense of purpose after job loss, international relocation, and a major career shift. In this post, I’ll share how redefining purpose helped me adapt to expat life—and why that shift changed everything.
🌏 What Is an Expat, Really?
An expat, short for expatriate, is someone who lives outside their native country—whether for work, family, adventure, or simply a change of pace. Unlike immigrants, who often intend to settle permanently, expats typically maintain ties to their home country and view their time abroad as temporary or transitional. From corporate assignments to personal reinventions, expat life comes in many forms.
That’s when it clicked: I had actually been an expat before.
🇺🇸 My First Expat Life in the U.S.
I moved to the U.S. at 22 for a PhD in biotechnology. At the time, I didn’t label myself as an expat—I was a student chasing dreams. But looking back, that’s exactly what I was.
The first year was tough. Language barriers made it hard to understand lectures, make friends, and even order food. Every foreign student has their “embarrassing English” story—and I had plenty. But worse than mispronunciations was the feeling of isolation that comes with not being able to fully connect.
Then came culture shock. In China, I could easily get around—buses and subways were everywhere, and shops were always within walking distance. But in California, everything was spread out, and life revolved around cars. I didn’t know how to drive, and with limited public transport, I couldn’t go shopping, explore, or leave campus on my own. I felt isolated and confined to a loop between my dorm and the lab. Even food was unfamiliar—cheese tasted strange to me. I did find comfort in muffins and cookies… until I realized I’d gained 20 pounds!
What saved me? Finding purpose and finding people. My purpose then was clear: to earn my PhD and contribute to biomedical research that could make a real difference in people's lives. That purpose gave meaning to every lecture I struggled through, every lonely weekend, and every unfamiliar experience. It pushed me to improve my English, work harder in the lab, and stay resilient despite the cultural adjustments. Having a strong goal gave me structure when everything else felt uncertain.
At the same time, I was fortunate to meet my PhD mentor, Peggy, who didn’t just guide my academic path—she welcomed me into American culture. From mozzarella cheese to tequila at lab parties, she introduced me to a world that slowly became my own. That shared sense of purpose and human connection helped me move from struggling expat to confident immigrant. I built a career I loved, started a family, and found a home in San Jose over 14 meaningful years.
✈️ When Life Changes Course: Becoming an Expat Again
In 2024, my life changed. I was laid off from a biotech company I loved due to a failed Series B funding round. Though I quickly received new job offers, I paused. Was it time to break from the traditional path? My husband’s job offered a chance to relocate to Singapore—and I said yes.
And just like that, I became an expat again.
🏙️ Starting Over in Singapore: No Culture Shock, But No Clear Purpose
Unlike my move to the U.S., Singapore felt instantly familiar. It’s a multicultural city where Chinese, Malay, Indian, and Eurasian communities live together in harmony. There was no language barrier, no major cultural clash. But there was something deeper missing: purpose.
As a Dependent Pass holder, I couldn’t easily work. Full-time jobs were hard to get without visa sponsorship. Becoming a full-time housewife was a tempting fallback—after all, I had a one-year-old son. But what about when he started school at 1.5? I knew myself: I needed purpose beyond caregiving.
💡 Redefining Purpose: A New Framework for Expat Life
So I redefined my purpose across four pillars:
1. 👶 Family as Priority
Losing my job when my son was 3 months old turned out to be a gift. I could finally give him the attention I couldn’t give my first child as a full-time working mom. I now spend intentional time with both kids—drawing with my daughter, teaching her phonics, taking them to playgrounds, and traveling together. (You can read about our family adventures in our family travel blog series, and more upcoming trips!) This time with them has brought unmatched joy and closeness to our family.
2. 👩💻 Consulting to Stay Sharp
Through past colleagues, I met a local women’s health startup and offered bioinformatics consulting. The work isn’t groundbreaking, but it keeps me current, sharp, and socially connected. It led me to Singapore’s biotech startup scene, where I’ve started networking with other founders.
3. ✍️ Blogging to Reflect and Connect
This blog began with a simple thought: Maybe my journey could help someone else. Writing helps me process my experiences, and it’s teaching me marketing—something I never touched as a scientist. As an introvert, posting publicly is outside my comfort zone, but growth often is.
4. 🤖 Exploring AI and Entrepreneurship
For years, I dreamed of learning new technologies like AI. With more flexible time now, I finally dove in—took courses, attended conferences, and even built an AI prototype in a week. That prototype didn’t turn into a company, but it reignited my confidence. I plan to keep iterating until I find the right idea with both purpose and product-market fit.
🌱 A Final Thought: Purpose Fuels Adaptation
Expat life can be disorienting—even in a friendly, familiar place like Singapore. But redefining purpose gave me a path forward. Whether through family, freelance work, creativity, or exploration, purpose gives structure to uncertainty.
If you’re facing an expat transition, ask yourself not just what’s next, but what matters to you right now. You might not find one single answer—but that’s okay. Life is a mosaic, and every piece adds richness to the whole.
If this story resonated with you, I’d love to hear yours. Are you redefining your purpose abroad? Share your thoughts in the comments or connect with me on Instagram @drift2shift. And if you found this helpful, consider subscribing to the blog for more reflections on expat life, career shifts, and family adventures.
Looking for more stories from our expat journey? Check out our family travel blog series to see how we’re exploring the world from Singapore.
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